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1. You have a horse to ride because
A) being in competition gives you goals and lets you know how your horse stacks up against others.
B) you find it mentally stimulating to think through training issues and work on them with your horse.
C) riding your horse provides companionship, exercise and time away from work/family/house.
D) you enjoy the occasional lesson, being around the barn and talking about your horse.
E) ride? I thought I had them to be exhausted by horse chores and broke.
2. Your idea of a "hard lesson" is
A) a 40-minute longe lesson with no stirrups to improve your seat.
B) an intense one-hour lesson in which your horse and you perfect a movement or learn something new.
C) any 40- to 60-minute lesson
D) 20 minutes of riding and 30 minutes of mounted chitchat.
E) anything that involves trotting, using your legs or engaging your brain.
3. You would pay or have paid top dollar for a clinic with a really famous person because
A) of the insights that only the best can provide, even if he is hard on you.
B) you are thrilled just to be in the same arena as these people.
C) all the other people at your barn went, so you went, too, and were mostly mystified.
D) you mistakenly thought he would yell at you less than your regular instructor.
E) they provided a nice place to sit down with snacks.
4. If your horse were going with a "strong connection" and you found it tiring to ride him, you would
A) have your instructor ride him for a while to get him up off the forehand.
B) work on upper-body strength at the gym.
C) practice a lot of shoulder-fore, lateral movements and other exercises to lighten him.
D) get a more serious bit.
E) explain that you ride a [insert breed] and have no idea what you are talking about.
5. The 20th time your instructor says, "More leg," you think
A) I will increase my reps at the gym.
B) I wish I were 20 years younger and had the strength to do this work.
C) maybe I need bigger spurs.
D) these are all the legs I have.
E) that's it. I'm going to ride saddle seat or maybe buy a cow pony and a big hat.
6. In order to be physically fit to ride, you
A) go to the gym, do Pilates, get massages and see a sports psychotherapist.
B) go to Curves sometimes.
D) unload hay, clean stalls and jog around pasture in pursuit of horse.
C) do housework, which exhausts you.
E) do bicep curls with wine glasses.
7. If your instructor said your horse needed massage, chiropractic, acupuncture and Adequan®, you would
A) just do it. All high-level competition horses need these things.
B) think, What? No appointment with the kinesiologist, Chinese medicine expert and psychic?
C) ask why he needs each (or any) of these things and do those deemed most important.
D) decline all of the above, buy a pack of supplements online instead and hope for the best.
E) feel deprived (He's not the one who can hardly walk after a 20-minute ride.)
8. If you couldn't ride anymore, you would
A) be in a box, six feet under.
B) volunteer as a scribe, audit clinics, support riders with Olympic ambitions and maintain your interest in the sport.
C) get a tiny pony and drive him, do Parelli ground work and anything to be around horses.
D) take up golf; watching other people ride would be way too depressing.
E) secretly feel really, really relieved.
9. If your instructor told you that your horse will never compete successfully at the level to which you aspire, you would
A) sell the horse and move on to the horse that can do the job.
B) keep the horse and buy a second one for competition.
C) keep working with this horse, because you never know.
D) feel really, really relieved, because now you can stop trying.
E) feel cynical, a little disappointed and really angry.
10. If your coach/instructor told you that your horse was too talented for an amateur (i.e., you) and needed to be ridden by a pro (i.e., her) you would
A) develop a nine-point plan to be able to ride up to the level of this particular horse.
B) be happy that he had so much talent and suggest she ride the horse with the idea that you can ride him later.
C) think, Well, I'm sorry about that, but he's my horse and he can just go at my level.
D) wonder if your instructor's horse was currently lame.
E) See "E" above (in number 9)
